Interview with Fran Stockley - Relationship to food
This part of our conversation was all about our relationship to food, craving, additions, body shame and how we can start to make changes.
How long did it stop you to crave crappy food? (such as take away or chocolate)
Such a good question, which has lots of layers to it.
My experience with my own health, if we were to have chocolate and coffee, my experience would be I would want them again later or the next day because they are so addictive. I’ve been eating this way (raw diet) for years but it’s not been without blips, having a sandwich, going for a curry . . . but those foods are designed to be addictive. Many of us beat ourselves up and we can’t get out of the cycle. But the first point to remember is, these foods are designed to be addictive, we’re not lacking willpower. If foods are really salty or has what's called an excitive toxin like caffeine or stimulate its excites us . . . but it also toxifies us. It gives us a massive high and we want them again, it’s the same with cigarettes, alcohol and drugs.
The cleaner your body is, the less it desires that type of stuff. People ask me what my comfort food is . . . but it's so much more satisfying for me to eat a mango or watermelon because it makes me feel light and awake and fresh rather than having really strong coffee or really dark chocolate because the hit only last so long and then I need it again so as your body gets cleaner you don’t desire that stuff as much. But what goes hand in hand with that as most of us lack glucose to brain which comes from natural sugars such as fructose and fructose is the power of life which is fruits and some veggies.
If we go all day with maybe a bit of toast or some coffee maybe a protein bar we get home and night and we've not had enough glucose throughout the day and we are literally starving and we can’t think straight because our brain hasn’t has what it needs so we crave something sweet. Wine is full of glucose which is why we drink it but it’s also addictive as well.
So . . .
- addictive foods are designed to be addictive, it’s very unlikely to be lack of willpower. Businesses are made to make money from the foods not our health
- The cleaner you are the less you desire it, glucose to the brain, it’s natural sugars.
I’ve worked with lots of people about the chocolate thing or sweet thing, as soon as they start having fruit or sweet potatoes, that craving goes because they have the sweetness but also more psychosomatic sometimes we eat food so we don’t have to feel and that's part of being a human being, we need to give ourselves a break.
Moving towards fresh fruits and veggies is not an overnight thing. It’s about clearing the obstructions and asking I wonder what is not allowing me or what I’m not wanting to feel. Sometimes we don’t want to feel, we can be grieving and food is a great way to deal with not feeling. The more you eat the less you feel as you’re concentrating on digestions and then you numb out and most of us have been used to feeling numb, eating until you're full so you have fuel for the next day but that's’ not necessarily true you're body is not designed for that.
When I’m working with that and asking ‘why is it you want to feel so full?’ Sometimes you don’t know and it can take 6 months, it's like peeling back the layers.
What’s your opinion on guilt surrounding food, feelings of guilt after eating chocolate or take away or generally have a negative relationship with food . . . what effect does that have on the body?
It has a massive effect, any guilt, self shaming or anger, I’ve definitely has that experience and I know you have, many men also have this experience but don’t talk about it as much. Stress itself is a spiral.
I don’t talk much about this as it's quite trendy at the moment but a woman of any shape or size, you should own it and be proud of your curves. I’m definitely into female empowerment but I saw a video of a woman the other day who is a plus size model, she is beautiful, curvy, gorgeous beautiful blond hair and great boobs in a bikini, she wasn't a size 10 maybe a 14 or 16 and a guy had written on her instagram fat cow or something like and this is why the NHS is a mess dealing with people like you who don’t take care of themselves . . it was something very provoking.
Her reaction was to create a little 2 minute video where she was in a bikini looking gorgeous flicking the middle finger and eating a packet of crisps. So for me I can see why that would be funny but it makes me feel like that is not female empowerment, eating a packet of crisps and being like I’ll eat what I want but not realising the effect it's having on the body. I’ve worked with many people with eating disorders and that’s like the worst message for these young girls . Why not eat a mango and be like I love my body, I may not be a size 10 but I look after my body.
It takes time to get back your health it’s not 6 weeks to healing your gut or 6 weeks to slim down . . . it takes time and commitment to yourself and that can be hard when the world around you sees that as an indulgence but it’s essential and if you don’t have that you can't be invested in anything else as you are only operating at 50% all the time.
If you are trying to make a change and you slip back it’s so tempting to be like ‘oh god this has undone everything I’ve tried to create and I have no willpower’ but you just get back on the next day, every day is a fresh day.
Do you have tips for people who body shame?
With people who are body shaming it’s about getting to a place where it’s not just about how their body looks but getting to how they want to feel. Doing it for freedom so that they can have your reason be bigger than your body shape go after their health which is deep work . . . ask - why do you want to?
~ Why do you want to have your health?
~ How important is it for you to sleep well at night or feel relaxed, confident?
~ If you had all those things how would your life be different?
Most people who come to me that want to lose weight, it’s great to want to get rid of excess, it’s simplifying and exciting but there has to be a bigger reason. Once you tap into that then it becomes less physical and the mental and emotional take over, people will often say to me things like ‘do you know what , my body is moving a bit slower than I thought but I feel sooo much better, so much more myself’ and that's always the prize, no matter whats happens in your life, if you have the control over your life then the rest is inevitable, Your body changes shape naturally.
Read Part 1 here